Alessandra Conti

Alessandra Conti is a Celebrity Matchmaker, Dating Coach, and Co-Founder of Matchmakers In The City, a personal Matchmaking firm headquartered in Los Angeles, California. Alessandra is a Matchmaker behind MTV's, “Are You The One”, and is the go-to Celebrity Matchmaker for shows like NBC's Access Hollywood, and CBS's Face The Truth. Her dating and relationship advice has been featured on Forbes, Elite Daily, The New Yorker, The LA Times, and Fox News. For nearly 10 years, Alessandra has worked with clients ranging from celebrities to young professionals and leads a team of matchmakers responsible for hundreds of marriages through their knowledge of interpersonal relationships, body language, and lie detection. She holds a BA in Communications from American University and is a Matchmaking Institute Certified Matchmaker (CMM).

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What if I like my BFF but she has a bf?
The sad truth about having feelings for a friend is that once you have feelings for a friend, they are no longer a friend, and they can never be just a friend to you ever again. That is just the truth, but it’s an empowering thing to know you’ve found an important boundary. You have to really weigh what is more important to you: this person's friendship, or the potential of a relationship with this person.

If you've decided that a potential relationship is worth more than their friendship, you can take the steps to pursue that. If you value them more as a friend, you need to find a way to get past your feelings. But if you still have those feelings in a friendship, it is no longer a friendship. They are not your friend, and you should not pretend to treat them like one. It's unfair not only to them, but your future partners.

If you do want to pursue them romantically, do more solo activities with them. Hang out outside of a group setting and then once have experienced more alone time with them, that's a good time to explore that relationship. Be upfront and say, “Listen, you're super attractive. I know we’re just friends but I'd love to see what happens with this.” Just put it out there and be honest. Either you get a romantic partner, or they say they’re not interested and you can move on knowing it was never possible to date anyway.

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